Unencumbered...

My Mom offered her future son-in-law a warm welcome long before Oprah said it was the right thing to do. Maybe she knew what he could expect from the men in our family and tried to provide some balance. Or maybe she understood the psychology of not opposing her grown daughter's choice of a suitor. Whatever her reasoning, I'll never forget her for it. After all, Garnet certainly didn't have the smoothest of introductions when it came to meeting my brother, my son, or my Dad. 

When Garnet met my brother they sat across from each other in the living room. Ted leaned back in his chair, folded his arms and said in a big brotherly way, "So... Garnet, just what ARE your intentions toward my little sister?". If looks could kill, when I introduced him to my son, Garnet should have self-combusted. But worst of all, when he shook hands with my Dad for the first time, it was over the pistol laying in Dad's lap. This was likely staged after he noticed the extra plate Mom set at the dinner table and when she told him I was bringing Garnet for dinner he asked, "Do we have to feed the stray?". It's a miracle Garnet stuck around at all.

Mom and I were both glad that he weathered that storm. Not many Mothers can say they adored their son-in-law like my Mom did. They became good friends and talked at length about a variety of topics. Garnet enjoyed Mom's company and she his. I remember her saying that she felt so close to Garnet it was as if he was her own son. But what you see is what you get with Garnet. He's not one to hide behind a facade or put on airs. 

He is the same man today that he was when we first met; an elegant, respectful, honest, gentle man, with a quick wit and keen mind. When we first started dating he told me I'd never meet anyone else like him and he was right. Knowing and loving him has made me a better person. He looks for the good and has the fortitude to tell you what you need to hear. He's my sounding board, my cheerleader, my partner, my defender, my friend. When I sing, he claps. He is true to his name - he is a gem. 

I'm not the only one who thinks so. Garnet retired this week after thirty-five years with one company. He had many great opportunities and worked with countless people over the span of his career. As many that could, gathered together at his retirement celebration to congratulate him and wish him well. Tributes to him mentioned his integrity, his consistency, his fairness, and his values. Some mentioned how glad they were he took a chance on hiring them, others said they still look for the "golden nugget of opportunity" he coached them to seek out. He was credited with an uncanny ability to get the job done, give sound advice and mentor with ease. I was not surprised by what I heard. I was overwhelmed with pride in what he had accomplished and honored to share my life with this remarkable man. 

I thought of my Mom and how much she would have enjoyed seeing him celebrated. I felt sad that she wasn't there to share the moment and applaud his achievement. She would've wanted to stand up and shout, "That's my boy!" even though he wasn't. I know she would be happy for us - for this new chapter in our life together. Sometimes I feel like she stepped out of the way so we could move forward - no longer encumbered with her care. She was selfless that way. Maybe, since she lives on in my heart, she felt my admiration for this cherished man and gave a rousing cheer. Just maybe...

And the rest is pixie dust...